That Feeling Sort of Like Loneliness, Only Worse

A Student-of-the-Human-Condition's Note on Alienation

This is a big theme in our texts. I'm fairly certain that is because this is a big theme in life. But what does it actually mean to be alienated? Is there a clear definition? Or is this one of those things that can only be 'best described' by a word instead of defined with one?

The problem of alienation comes from our problem of being socially motivated individuals. We are our own persons but we also are drawn to being social, we are herd animals. I suggest that being an individual and being social are not on opposite ends of one spectrum. I think they go hand in hand.

We must be individuals but we must also to some extent conform. We have to play nice while in the sandbox. I think we have to go from being in the sandbox to wanting to be out of the sandbox and ultimately back into the sandbox. We need to stop polarizing in and out of the sandbox. We need to view it as one process.

I think that our idea of alienation has two distinct variations: Alienation from an 'other' and alienation from oneself. The 'other' could be any type of thing other than yourself, concrete or abstract; family, friends, the community, country, culture, nature, a deity. Alienation from oneself is precisely that, not knowing anything about who you are.

Whenever I'm asked what I study I reply with: the human condition. I think this is what matters most, to me anyway. As a student of the human condition I wish I could explain how we got to where we are but what I really do is look at where we are. From there we can possibly see how we got here and hopefully see the future with a perspective which can endorse the good things and prevent the bad things. Even if I am right and we excel at this you can't beat chance. Chance: in case you thought you had things figured out.

That being said, the worst form of alienation I think is alienation from oneself. If you are alienated from who you are then you cannot participate in any social setting successfully. The problem we have is that we collectively suffer from this mass dissociation and we pretend we don't. The average person out there does not ever have to ask who they are in great detail, they can typically identify with one label or another and carry on. Life doesn't let you simply Keep Calm and Carry On.

The average person also doesn't necessarily play well in the sandbox. I think they give off the impression of playing well in the sandbox. But there is an thirst or hunger that cannot be ignored. Whether it takes a mid-life crisis to notice it or whether it is forced upon you from unfair circumstances it eventually pushes its way to the surface. Vacations are a funny example of this: a lot people will feel a need to escape or get away from it all for some reason or another, but really there is nothing to escape from, and you can't escape yourself no matter how hard you try. Would it be better for us to explore ourselves instead? I don't know. And probably not all the time. I like drinks and relaxing and friends and family. I prefer spending my vacations with people I love and care about and who love and care about me, regardless of the geographical location of the gathering. But I have not felt like having to escape from something for at least a decade.

Why run from this? Why hide from this? It is not doing us any good at present. Not completely understanding something does not give us permission not to try, nor does it mean we aren't capable. I am also not arguing that we spend our lives trying to understand this, we do, after all, have to get back in the sandbox.

If we are alienated from ourselves then we cannot honestly interact with 'the others' so alienation from the other is seemingly a guarantee. Why not refocus? Why not see that the individual and the social are part of the same thing? That thing is us. Perhaps this is just wishful thinking, romantic dreaming, drama-queenism. But I suspect there is something in it. Where do you search for yourself when that overwhelming feeling best described as alienation takes over? Where do you look? How do you look?